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Category Archives: From the Vaults

adapted from journal entries

cw: family grief 1/27/16 Of all the moments here at my grandmother’s, the one that felt the most… important? I dont know, words fail—was going through the top right drawer of her dresser, looking for the ring. Being in Dee’s room at all. Mom and me and my sister looking at her bookshelf. Not the […]

From The Vaults: Poetry Jar

At some point earlier in my life I had decided this system of writing down and randomly choosing ideas would be my means of staying fresh as a writer, of staying disciplined and busy. I never made use of the jar; systems like that have a way of frightening me off once I devise them. So I’m getting rid of it now, but I thought I’d post the contents.

One Hundred Unfinished Projects

Unfinished projects are definitely my demons. I feel better having purged them. Enjoy.

From the Vaults: Eyebrow Problems?

The Eyebrow Problems advertisement was eventually used as a party invitation.

From The Vaults: Ley Fuck You

An early attempt to get into Michael Lesy’s class: road trip to Magog and points north.

Youthful Escapism

Pictures of me trying to escape as a baby.

From The Vaults: Summer Evening Dinner With Seismologists

July, 1998 It’s berry season, so for once there was a lot I wanted to eat in this non-vegetarian house. There were few dishes not based on berries. Dried-cranberry challah. Deep-dish pie with blackberries, raspberries, and tiny champagne grapes. A salad with avocado, mesclun greens, raspberries, thick raspberry vinaigrette dressing, strawberries, blueberries, and the blackberries […]

From The Vaults: Letter To A Timid Traveler

This is why I don’t like travelling into the city. It’s an ordeal, and scheduling is an absolute nightmare. You are seriously overreacting. Four hours on the bus and half an hour in Port Authority is probably the mildest travel problem you will ever have. Try riding the bus for fourteen hours ending in a […]

From The Vaults: Opinion Poll

Originally published in the precursor to the DSWJ, 02/09/00 THE ADVERTISING INDUSTRY SEEMS TO BE VERY INTERESTED IN MY PERSONAL HABITS! THEY CALL ME AT HOME AND ASK ME QUESTIONS ABOUT MY PRODUCT PREFERENCES! THEY COOKIE MY COMPUTER! THEY SEND POLLS DIRECTLY TO MY HOUSE ASKING WOULD I LIKE A BRAND OF CIGARETTES WITH LESS […]

From The Vaults: I Hate New York In June

Excerpted for a piece I wrote for the Omen in April(?) of 1999 MY SPRING BREAK This spring brake I went to NewYork city I did not go with my mom or dad i went With my freinds. Newyork City sucks it is the dirtiest, ugliest, yuckiest jo-jeezly city in the yoonerverse. I would rather […]