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Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen

Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen are a brand. Let’s just admit it, all right? Not people, a brand. Thanks to the reporter who stated the obvious in this article about their new magazine. It’s called marykateandashley magazine. Clever, right? Did you know that the brand promoted by these horrible humanlike by-products of the television industry includes a cartridge which will turn your Game Boy into a day planner? Did you know that these terrible sirens are enticing children to do things which normally make children run screaming in fear, like taking cruises to Stockholm? Did you know they like shoes? Oh, stop already, I’ve had enough. How long until we hear that these scrawny chicken-birds are posing underage for P1ayb0y, and are reminded with a creepy-crawly feeling up our spines of the first time we saw them gurgle and coo at the camera on Full House?

Just so you don’t get the wrong idea and think that being a twin involves having some horrible genetic defect that makes you want to turn yourself into an advertising device, I want to remind you that I have twin sisters who are perfectly normal.

16 Comments

  1. Natalie evans wrote:

    hi does any on have mka email or msn name if u do please email it to me at mjevans8@aol.com.

    i love mka and im there number 1 fan love u mka

    Saturday, May 27, 2006 at 1:02 pm | Permalink
  2. James wrote:

    You guys don’t know what you talkin bout. They both asked me out.Trust me I’m a chick magnet you mother fuckers. I’m 19 and they asked me out

    Friday, June 9, 2006 at 6:49 pm | Permalink
  3. Anonymous wrote:

    reconstruct tedious shotguns putting reprobate….

    Tuesday, September 5, 2006 at 6:17 pm | Permalink
  4. no one wrote:

    i just want MKA olsen email…if any one have add me at ( funky_girl_kate3@hotmail.com )

    Friday, September 29, 2006 at 1:19 pm | Permalink
  5. no one wrote:

    i just want MKA olsen email…if any one have add me at ( funky_girl_kate3@hotmail.com )

    Friday, September 29, 2006 at 1:19 pm | Permalink
  6. tasha wrote:

    jeff is dumb MK & A are awesome and i know u want 2 screw them jeff you suck ther dads balls all night long i love mary kate and ashley i watch there show there so hott from natsha im a less to so call me @6048693141

    Wednesday, October 18, 2006 at 6:11 pm | Permalink
  7. tash wrote:

    jeff just shut your mouth & go screw your mumma

    Wednesday, October 18, 2006 at 6:16 pm | Permalink
  8. michelle wrote:

    they are soo cool they are pretty and they have a great body.

    Monday, October 23, 2006 at 9:36 pm | Permalink
  9. kurt wrote:

    i have mary kate n ashleys msn brapppp!!! speak 2 me if u want it kurt_hadwin2k6@hotmail.co.uk

    Friday, March 9, 2007 at 6:21 pm | Permalink
  10. kurtis wrote:

    i have mary kate n ashleys msn addys brapppp if u want it ask

    Friday, March 9, 2007 at 6:23 pm | Permalink
  11. BOB wrote:

    I HAVE MARY KATE N ASHLEYS MSN

    JUST ASK IF U WANT IT GUYS THERE R BOTH TOP TO SPEAK 2

    JUST ASKKKKK

    Friday, March 9, 2007 at 6:41 pm | Permalink
  12. ljkjkjh2gmail.com wrote:

    i already know them enough that i have already had sex with both of them at the same time.

    Saturday, March 10, 2007 at 3:09 am | Permalink
  13. troy smith wrote:

    hi do u girl s have a boy friend

    Tuesday, April 3, 2007 at 8:39 pm | Permalink
  14. serra nergiz wrote:

    ı love you mary kate and ashley olsen ı like yours everything ı think ım a twin like yours

    Monday, April 23, 2007 at 3:02 pm | Permalink
  15. MKLJJ wrote:

    I HAVE SPOKEN TO MK, I DIDNT KNEW IT WAS HER, BUT SHE HAS A CAM, SO I THINK IT IS HER miss_mkay_olsen86@hotmail.com THERE YA GO:)

    Friday, April 27, 2007 at 2:18 pm | Permalink
  16. azzza1234 wrote:

    i would love to fuck them both and the dudes who i gay fuck off please cuz trying to wank over em and your turning me off so fuck off or els………?

    Friday, May 25, 2007 at 1:13 pm | Permalink

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