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as the plumber I’ve been negotiating with so charmingly calls them.

The seats of the toilets at work are invariably spattered if not flooded wwith urine. This is in the women’s room, mind you, not the men’s. Apparently it is the habit of the people who come through our clinic to suspend themselves above the seat. This makes their aim so inaccurate that the underside of the raised lid is even liberally dampened, sometimes.

My take on the matter is that these are women who are so marginalized by American society, especially social service agencies such as our own, that they trust nothing, not even the toilet seats. Nat and the rest of the girls in my office have other theories which are not so forgiving. I think they probably know better than I do. Still, I cling to my hypothesis.

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