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What NOT To Do With Photoshop

NOT, NOT, NOT. People, I can’t emphasize this enough. DON’T do things like this with Photoshop. Some of it’s just retouching, but there is something WRONG about ADDING EYES INTO A PICTURE WHEN YOUR GRANDDAUGHTER HAS BLINKED. Also with making your wife look like she’s in the waxworks, or pinching a guy’s head to make him look thinner… and would it *kill* you to learn some of the more sophisticated tools, like color balance?!

Don’t ask how I found this… had something to do with a search for pictures of fat women in bikinis — yes, I checked the porn sites already — don’t ask why… ok, I’ll tell you, it has something to do with a certain ad campaign I hate. just you wait, mr. madden, just you wait…

Oh, how lucky am I to have just found a GIANT picture of the Venus of Willendorf? How lucky was I that I even had a teacher in high school who wouldn’t let us forget about the V.o.W.? For sooo many reasons, too — I credit Dr. Feldmeth’s insistence that we go view Greek statuary for my awareness that current American physical ideals for women are 1) stupid and 2) transitory. Thanks, Dr. F.

One Comment

  1. Anonymous wrote:

    I heard Mr. Madden went to jail for fraud. Vengeance is yours.

    Wednesday, September 25, 2002 at 6:39 pm | Permalink

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